Q: How are you today? Q: Huh? Q: This is going to be a tough interview. Q: Can you answer that question seriously? Q: You use the word Albuquerque a lot. Why? Q: And where was that? Q: Why I oughta… Never mind. Okay, what was your first joke ever? Q: I don’t get it. Q: Is it hard being a comedian? Q: Do you ever get heckled? Q: Were you always funny? Q: Why is that? For the rest of it, go to this link: http://www.brianregan.com/q_and_a.html
A: Because my heart is beating.
A: You asked, “How are you today?” “How?” That’s how.
Where do you get your ideas for your jokes.
A: I get them in Spain.
A: Okay, I get them in Albuquerque.
A: Because it reminds me of when I was growing up in Albuquerque, going to Albequerque High, and working at
Albuquerque Al’s Authentic House of Albuquerquian Cuisine.
A: In New Mexico.
A: WHAAAAAAAA!
A: It’s a newly born infant joke. It’s very funny.
A: Oh yes. Especially when I’m in bars and motorcycle gangs walk in bellowing things like, “Who here does observational comedy?”
A: No. Oh wait, one time. A guy in Nebraska yelled something about corn. But he might have just been ordering.
A: No. I wasn’t funny on November 3rd,
1998.
A: I just couldn’t think of anything funny
that day.
Posts Tagged ‘Comedy’
Ashley G. and Brian Regan
Tuesday, July 19th, 2005Little Rascals
Sunday, May 29th, 2005Dear Darla,
I hate your stinking guts.
You make me vomit.
You’re scuuuuuuuuuum between my toes!
Love, Alfalfa.
Vin Diesel
Monday, May 16th, 2005The crater in the Yucatan Penninsula was created when Vin Diesel’s spaceship ran out of fuel and crashed into the face of the earth.
Vin often eats seven burning tires for a midnight snack.
Vin Diesel discovered his name is an anagram for “The perfect human”. Those who were skeptical attempted it and found it was indeed true.
Vin Diesel got so angry at a mountain blocking his path that he punched it as hard as he could. Some of the pieces came back down and are now called Stonehenge. The part that didn’t became the moon.
These and more at this site: http://www.4q.cc/vin/
Let the hilarity begin!
Homestar Runner
Sunday, May 1st, 2005A shout out to my old friend the Homestar Runner for being consistantly funny and the source of much of my comic-relief material for the last 3 or 4 years. I can’t believe I’ve been watching the stuff on that site every week since Strong Bad E-mail #29! Anyway, look at that one, and more! I just wanted to mention it because it’s been getting funnier and funnier.
Features to look for:
Marzipan’s Answering Machine: Chaos ensues with every new message that she gets!
Teen Girl Squad!: A hilarious look back at the girls from your class. Seriously..every class had these girls.
Strong Bad E-mails: Strong Bad answers a REAL e-mail almost every monday. Hilarity ensues.
Toons, Shorts, Holiday, Puppet Stuff, Powered by The Cheat: The genius continues as the characters are expanded with spinoffs and other things!
It’s hard to believe this is all the brainchild of Mike and Matt Chapman, aka the Brothers Chaps. One animates, and the other does all of the voices except for Marzipan, and The Cheat’s cartoon voices.
Not only that, but the site is clean, and the animation is better than a lot of what we see on TV these days.
Lord of the Rings indeed
Saturday, March 5th, 2005My friend Kathy sent me this. Too hilarious not to put up here!
Scrubs Prank
Sunday, October 10th, 2004You know what is a funny show? Scrubs. Wow, what a funny show! It resulted in this conversation I had with my friend Malachi at the http://www.matrixfans.net chatroom:
[09:24] Malachi: Dr. Daman is going to take care of you
[09:24] ????
[09:24] * Malachi looks scared
[09:24] say “who’s Dr. Daman”
[09:27] who is Mr. Daman?
[09:27] without the Mr.
[09:28] who is Dr. Daman?
[09:28] without the Dr.
[09:28] who is Daman?
[09:28] I’m DA MAN!
[09:28] THAT WAS FUN!
[09:28] DOING THAT WITH YOU
[09:28] heh
Public Domain Comedy!
Tuesday, June 22nd, 2004
I’ve just learned the Wonders of Public Domain Comedy! What is PDC, you ask? Read on my friends:
Welcome!
It’s ten degrees funnier inside.
Congratulations on entering the Public Domain Comedy Guide.
Before we begin, though, you should all take the Public Domain Comedy Oath:
I, (state your name), do solemnly swear to uphold the good name of Public Domain Comedy as fervently as I possibly can. I promise to use my comedy loudly in public places, thereby giving my material to others as freely as others gave my material to me. I promise to laugh loudly when others engage in a showing of Public Domain Comedy, thereby encouraging them in their quest to be funny and additionally showing others within earshot that Public Domain Comedy actually works. And finally, I promise not to use my Public Domain Comedy for monetary profit of any kind. To do so would be wrong and may guarentee me Middle Act status at any number of comedy clubs across the Midwest.
There! Now you’re in!
Do you feel funnier? You will!
Here’s a FAQ:
“What is Public Domain Comedy?”
Well, Billy, “Public Domain Comedy” can be defined as any joke or wisecrack that at one time in history was funny and original but has now been so absorbed into the mainstream that it is constantly accessed by even the most unfunny of people.
Did you know …?
That you have already had an opportunity to engage in Public Domain Comedy on this page? Did you spot it? Did you do it?
Well, if you, when taking the pledge, instead of actually stating your name said the phrase “State your name” and then chuckled to yourself …
Congratulations! You just dabbled in Public Domain Comedy!
You see, the “State Your Name” PD Joke was many years ago a funny and fairly original gag from the Bill Murray film, “Stripes.” However, the joke was a) funny enough and b) easy enough for most people to remember so that it disseminated itself throughout the schools, courtrooms and VFW halls across this fine land of ours.
And now that you know what it is …
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Let’s learn some!
Thanks to George Lucas and his sound enhancing invention THX, one of the most popular and surefire laughgetters for the non-pro is only a movie ticket away.
The “Turn It Up” Gag
Once the THX sound swell has reached its ear-splitting peak and faded out to silence, the adroit Public Domainer will yell out at the top of his lungs, “Turn it up!” Big laughs from fellow audience members are guarenteed.
Best delivery conditions: If the audience cheers the loudness level of the sound swell, the joke will land more solidly than an Olympic long jumper hitting a freshly raked pit of sand, provided the PDer waits until the cheers just begin to fade.
Worst delivery conditions: If the sound in the theater is actually not loud enough. In these cases, the joke can be misinterpreted as a complaint and, well, nobody likes a complainer. Use your judgement. A good PDer is always ready to analyse a comedy situation and react accordingly.
The “The Audience is Listening” Gag
When underneath the THX logo the phrase “The Audience is Listening” appears, the acting-enabled PDer will say in a questioning voice, “What?” Hearty chuckles and approving smiles from surrounding audience members can be counted on. (You may even receive validation from Neo-Luddites in the audience who feel that your joke was a strike against The Man for all this Surround Sound technology – see, sometimes PD Comedy can make you look smart too.)
Best delivery conditions: The louder the THX sound swell, the better this joke will hit. This is also a performance-dependent gag, so any rehearsal time spent refining your delivery will not be time poorly spent.
Worst delivery conditions: Same as “Turn It Up” gag. No one likes a whiner.
For more, go here:
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